Borrowed Breath

Okay, so I don’t vent very often.

I try to make this website a happy place.
But I just have to say, I hate forwarded chain emails.

I hate them. I hate them. I hate them.

The promise of blessings annoys me.

You know the ones I mean.

The blessings that will fall upon the recipient if they continue the insanity of forwarding this email to, not just one, but ten of their friends.
And the clause about sending it back to the person who sent it to you is worse.

I have never, ever, ever participated in this activity.
If you forward me one of those emails, I will not forward it to anybody, and I will not reply to you.

It will be deleted, banished to email purgatory.

I will take my chance on missing out on the blessing that surely would have been mine had I joined in the folly.

And then there are the ones with cute or dramatic stories.

More than 50% of these can be quickly proven false by spending 60 seconds on snopes.com.

If a cute little story sounds just too good to be true, then guess what…

And if you are simple enough to buy into the promised blessing, you have my sympathy.

Don’t fill up my inbox with National Enquirer type drivel.
I’m a busy guy.

Resist the temptation to waste everyone else’s time.
Delete it.

Stop the madness.

The work emails are the worst.
Some of them take up more kilo-whatevers than the graphics are even worth.

Who comes up with these?
The cute slideshows that take 10 minutes to view are annoying enough.
But some have music accompaniment that suddenly blares from my computer speakers upon opening, disrupting everyone within a 4 mile radius.
I am now mad at you…not at the email, at you.

You’ve violated simple email etiquette.

Leave me alone.
I’m a grumpy old man.