Borrowed Breath

One of my developing personal core values is desperate dependence.  In this life, parents want their children to grow up and become independent.  If I was still living at home, still eating mom and dad’s food, still lounging around the house, still without a job, my parents would say, “Grow up.  Stop depending on us.” 

But in the spiritual realm, our heavenly Father wants us to become more and more dependent on Him, not less and less.  He doesn’t want us to grow up and stop relying on Him.  Think of the most mature man or woman of God you know, someone whose faith you desire to emulate.  Are they more dependent on God, or are they more self-reliant?  Of course, they are more dependent on God.  And they are growing needier with each passing day. 

Sure, I’m quick to admit that I need Jesus.  But do I, in the quietness and privacy of my personal devotions, cry out to my God from the depths of my helpless state?  Or do I only cry out for His aid when things have gotten out of my control?  Do I seek His guidance and help from the very beginning, knowing that without Him I can do nothing but mess things up? 

Desperate dependence,
Jehovah defend me,
     I need you more than I even know.
Broken and needy,
My soul is pleading
     For wisdom you long to bestow.  

Without your guidance,
My sight is blindness,
     I cannot see the path before me.
I need your vision,
In my indecision,
     Revive me, Jesus, and restore me.

Spirit inside me,
Lead and guide me
     On this journey to the Promised Land.
I need you more
Than I have before,
     More than I know or understand.